Tape Noise Diary

The thing I find most difficult about introversion is being aware of such a thing. I would make a bet that there are more introverts aware of their introversion than there are extroverts aware of their extroversion. Why would I dare to make such a bet? Let me ask you this second question: Have you ever heard an extrovert having to explain, rationalize, or defend his own personality? Probably not because extroversion is the normal personality. It’s the expected behavior from most people. It’s the encouraged behavior. And it’s the behavior society rewards most.

So clearly there are many people who don’t know what introversion is exactly. That’s because introverts are the minority. When extroverted people bump with introverts they just can’t deal with it. They are in awe and surprised that you can be comfortably silent for hours. It’s odd to them, because technically, it is odd. The minority is not normal to the majority. This curiosity by the extrovert leads to a confrontation. Well, at least from the point of view of the introverted, the questioning of your personality feels that way. They tag you as shy, immature, arrogant, weird, geek, nerd, etc.

This will happen through out an introverts’ life every time he meets new people. And because it happens so much, it’s inevitable ending up discovering that there’s such a thing called introversion. But this is the tricky part: it’s really freaking hard to prove your abnormalcy as normal. To others and to yourself. Pulling out the introversion card to others seem like an excuse. A cop-out. You can never be truly objective about yourself. You can’t be your own psychologist. It doesn’t even matter what personality you have; explaining why you are they way you are is just introspective masturbation. Kind of like this post.

I’m making it sound more dramatic than it really it is. I don’t constantly feel abnormal and insecure. I’m perceptive and empathic. I’m shy but it’s nothing extreme. I’m as shy as most people. While sometimes I feel like Adam Sandler in Punch Drunk Love, I have an average and functioning social life. Of course, when your younger it’s tougher dealing with introversion and it can lead to more negative things like depression. But as you get older you learn to deal with it. The trick is knowing when to pull out that introversion card. Sometimes is best not to because it will make things worse. My rule of thumb is if you really value the friendship or the potential friendship, try as much as you can to be understood.